Sunday, January 18, 2009

Just fun

The following excerpts were recorded word for word by court reporters during real court proceedings (taken from 'Disorder in the Court' by Charles M. Sevilla):

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
------------------------------------------------------
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
------------------------------------------------------
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
------------------------------------------------------
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
-------------------------------------------------------
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
--------------------------------------------------------
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
---------------------------------------------------------
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
----------------------------------------------------------
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

4 comments:

saqysay said...

Solo de paso...
Saludos!!

Unknown said...

divertido, preguntas tontas, respuestas tontas... comentarios tontos, jijiji cualqueir parecido con la realidad es mera coincidencia

mzorotovic said...

jajajaja "Every year"

Juan said...

¡Hilarante!